If Easter says anything to us today, it says this: You can put truth in a grave, but it won’t stay there. You can nail it to a cross, wrap it in winding sheets and shut it up in a tomb, but it will rise! - Clarence W. Hall
here's some dork jokes for anyone who feels like being intelligent ( you will after this) Q: What do ducks have for lunch? A: Soup and quackers!
Q: Why did the rabbit cross the road? A: Because it was the chicken's day off.
Q: What do you call a bunny with a dictionary in his pants? A: A smarty pants.
Q: What do you call a bunny with a large brain? A: An egghead.
Q: What would you call the Easter Bunny if he married a chicken? A: The very first rabbit to lay an egg!
Q: Why are people always tired in April? A: Because they just finished a march
Q: Why did the magician have to cancel his show? A: He'd just washed his hare and couldn't do a thing with it.
The Rules of Chocolate
If you get melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.
The problem: How to get two pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.
Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.
A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?
If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?
If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.
Money talks. Chocolate sings.
Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.
Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous? Because no one wants to quit.
Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.
Chocolate is a health food. Chocolate is derived from cacao beans. Bean = vegetable. Sugar is derived either from sugar beets or cane, both vegetables. And, of course, the milk/cream is dairy. So eat more chocolate to meet the dietary requirements for daily vegetable and dairy intake.
